Sunday, January 8, 2012

The Grocery Store Epidemic

Since so many people ask me what do I eat (as if I am surviving on leaves and berries and shit) I am posting my menu plan for this week.   

Also, tomorrow morning is my scheduled weekly trip to the grocery store.  The grocery store to me is one of the 7 wonders of my world!  It's a fucking  labyrinth where you "start" with a hand full of coupons for stuff you never buy normally but you hold them tightly with your kung-fu grip as you make your way through the maze of aisles strategically designed with end caps to distract you from finding what you are looking for.  All the while you are trying to decipher which brand of what product to buy and simultaneously doing some sort of algebraic calculation in your head of which size is the better deal.

Once you have sucessfully found all your items you are then unleashed on the cashiers.  In my case, since I go early in the morning the cashiers are lifers (lifers = cashiers working at the same grocery store 15+ years).  

If you get into a Lifer's line you are pretty much FUCKED and DOOMED FOR THE NEXT 10 MINUTES OF YOUR LIFE!  As they scan each item they say it out loud, and then try to guess with a sure fire confidence what your are planning to cook: "oh you have broccoli and cream cheese, I bet you are making casserole!"  So now the otherwise quick-scan, bag, cash out process can take upwards of 10 minutes.

After you have forked over your coupons, savings club card, hard earned cash and your patience you are handed a winning pile of receipts, more coupons and told to have a nice day.  I CALL BULLSHIT -- Oh well a grocery shopping I will go!

Oh Well, Here is this week's menu!


1 comment:

  1. Wow! This looks suspiciously similar to my own menu:) No carbs or sugar, and very low fat. Good stuff:)


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